Today's #WellnessWednesday post is very meaningful to me because it was an epiphany I had very recently. On Sunday I celebrated my 35th birthday and it was a bit surreal. All week I was really struggling about everything and nothing all at the same time. Everything because I found myself questioning my current life choices and nothing because I realized I actually loved all of my life choices... even the "bad" ones. I found myself in this odd loop of things I probably should have accomplished and then complete and total indifference. What the heck? However confusing, my thoughts led me to my blissful epiphany, that I, June Suepunpuck, am not my number.
Every year that goes by I become a bit more disconnected from the actual number of years I have been on this planet because it doesn't not properly reflect how I feel inside. Inside I'm still a giddy 18 year old girl who is still getting to know herself, still exploring, still figuring out what it means to be an "adult," and still getting hormonal acne (omg, guys this can still be a thing in your 30s????? Horrifically, yes). Seriously why does a number have to hold so much weight anyways?
It's so easy to get caught up in the downsides of growing older, but the honest truth is that there are so many benefits that come with aging. Here is what I will totally remind myself of next year if I start feeling like my age is catching up to me:
-You are ever evolving, growing, learning, and transforming. There is no timeline for you to become the person you are becoming. There is no rush.
-It's your birthday. Do what you want to do and don't be afraid to vocalize it. It's not selfish to take the day to be alone if you want. It's no selfish to throw yourself an "I am AWESOME" party. No need for apologies.
-Do something the little kid inside of you would LOVE. Go to Disneyland. Build a sandcastle. Destroy the sandcastle! Just get in touch with something that makes you feel alive...
-Give yourself permission to indulge in things you wouldn't normally do. (Note to self: look into spa hopping)
-Make it your wedding day. Marry your damn self! I know someone who married herself on her 60th birthday and it was spectacular. The older you get doesn't mean the less time you have. In fact, it's more time for you to commit to doing exactly what you want and how you want to do it. Write yourself some vows and promise yourself that you will honor them for the rest of the year or even the rest of your life. You are worth it.
-It's just another day like any other. There's no pressure. Technically, your whole life is the celebration!!
Soma & Ulte
P.S. Get dressed up in a ballgown because you can. Life's short. Be your own Queen.... AND King.